Make the world a safer place - chop down all the trees

I have just been reminded how far down the road to institutionalised lunacy we have travelled.

Big handsome trees in fine condition have been felled by the Council this week in Bristol because of Health and Safety fears. If their branches were to fall, they might hurt someone. More trees are in line for the chop. In fact, would it not make sense to fell alll the trees in the city? They are all dangerous.

More worrying than the Council's position is our own complicity. We see these things happen and do nothing, for we are busy, or rushing off to a meeting, or believe that the Council knows best. We get the institutional behaviour we deserve, don't we?

I'm off to capture all the local dogs - they are a hazard. As for those bloody birds that wake me up in the morning.... But somebody somewhere is no doubt working on a genetically modifed warble-free blackbird. Thank Heavens for science.